Communication...

A dude called Eric Berne in the 1950's once said 'when two people encounter each other, one of them will speak to the other. This he called the Transaction Stimulus. The reaction from the other person he called the Transaction Response.' Simple really or it should be...

All too often when people talk, as well as the actual words that are said, a whole heap of other stuff is said or at maybe just heard. This really winds me up!

Berne reckoned there was three states, he called them Ego States but that sounds a bit weird. So these states are as above. The ideal is when Adult communicates with adult. Just straight forward communication, people being honest and straight forward in what they say and grown up and straight forward about what they hear. So often though people assume an either dominant or over nurturing parent role or a rebellious or over-dependant child role. Often without realising too.

This means that we assume that the other person is thinking or feeling something or that they ought to be thinking or feeling something that they're not. It usually ends in a big mess of EastEnders style argument, drama and hurt feelings. This can go on for years too. I see it everyday, people who are stuck in one particular state or role with certain people and it affects the way they say or hear every word.

Anyway enough of my ranting for now